Taylor Swift And Calvin Harris Are DUNZO!

The Dark Lord Taylor Swift and her sketchy massage parlor loving boyfriend, Calvin Harris, have broken up after 15 months of contractual dating!

The split is being played off as amicable, but if you’ve been following us then you know there’s got to be more to it.

Taylor Swift And Calvin Harris Are DUNZO!

The couple has yet to put out an official statement, but multiple sources (Team Swift) have confirmed the news.

According to a source close to the couple, “There was no drama. Things just don’t work out sometimes.”

Yeah, okay source.

Let’s not forget, the couple fought off breakup rumors last October when Calvin was caught leaving a shady-looking massage parlor on Sunset Boulevard… you know, because a man worth over $100 MILLION could probably just have someone massage him at his mansion.

It then appeared that Taylor and Calvin had unleashed their legal team to get the embarrassing moment wiped from the internet, but the damage had been done.

Well whatever happened in that Thai massage joint, it look like this relationship has come to a not-so happy ending.

Cue the T. Swift breakup song jokes in 3, 2, 1…

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